How to Bridge the Gap Between Fear and Confidence

I posted this blog yesterday. I found errors I wanted to correct so I took it down. On this Sunday rainy morning I came across some insight about fear that I felt needed to be added. The pieces I have added I put all in CAPS for you to see. My heart and mind told me they were that important. I hope they help you with the fear you face. They have already helped me! How do we bridge the gap between fear and confidence? I often ask participants of my Speakers Boot Camp what holds them back the most? The number one response I get is FEAR. Surprisingly, it is not the fear of speaking! I hear fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of disappointing others, fear of loss, even fear of success. It almost doesn't matter how fear masks itself, it never fails to raise its UGLY head! For most of us, we all have something that holds us back; something that keeps us from reaching the goals, the success, the professional position, the life you want. The life I want. It is something very specific in our minds, yet sometimes we can’t even name it ...
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Work Harder On Yourself Than You Do Your Job

This quote has echoed in my head since I was 22 years old. When I started my spoken communications company in 2002, this became a core principle. It reflects how important I see our ability to communicate and speak - it is our key to our personal and professional success! Our program is thirty hours of information, practice and feedback. Everyone goes home physically and emotionally tired! I believe if we want to increase the value we bring to our families, friends, businesses and community we must continue to develop, learn and grow! I heard a friend of mine say, “The more we grow the island of knowledge, the longer the shore of ignorance.” Below is an email I received from a man who went through on of our programs. He truly is an example of someone working harder on himself. He made tremendous progress and is not giving himself enough credit! Aloha Bart, Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and blessed gift with us.  I found this class and material very valuable.  Watching and hearing the recording of myself was very painful and hard to watch and hear, yet at the same time it was an eye-opening ...
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People Buy From People They Like

One of my core beliefs is the simple principle … people buy from people. I always take it one step further to … people buy from people they like. Today I received an email from my friend Ken, who went through one of my classes several years ago. He made a comment that has me reeling with excitement and exploration of how to put this principle into effect! He said, “PEOPLE LIKE TO CREATE WITH PEOPLE THEY LIKE!” That immediately reminded me of something Simon Sinek said, “Do business with people who think the way you think! Steven Jobs said, “Forget the agnostics, focus on the believers!” If words are the most powerful drugs on the planet, then we have been given some of the most powerful cures for our personal lives, professional lives, our businesses and our purpose! Let’s focus on what Ken said so brilliantly. “PEOPLE LIKE TO CREATE, PEOPLE LIKE TO CREATE WITH PEOPLE THEY LIKE!” PEOPLE LIKE TO CREATE! I wish I had a dime for every person I have spoken with that said, “All I want to do is make a difference, I am just not sure how”. I can remember saying that thousands ...
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SPEAKING – THE POWER OF STANDING IN THE GAP

One of my favorite old stories is when God states, “My eyes go to and from looking in the world for a man or woman who is willing to stand in the gap!” The gap or hole in the story was in the wall that protected the people and the city from danger! I had an opportunity to stand not in the gap, but near the wall, a piece of the wall - the wall that separated East and West Germany. The memorial of the wall in Berlin takes up almost a full long city block. You can get a sense of its thickness, height and holes (created by the wall peckers - people who tried to create holes for others to climb through). Very close to the memorial is a museum that depicts life on both sides of the wall before it came down. You climb two sets of stairs and stand on a platform as if you are looking over the wall from the west side. It gives you the sense of what life may have been like with sights, sounds and a feeling of 3D. The experience takes you through sun up and sun down. The detail ...
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SPEAKING -THE POWER OF SILENCE and STORY

For those of us in the speaking profession, when we speak of the power of silence, we are normally referring to the power of the pause. I have always believed we pause for two reasons: one as a tool to rid ourselves of UM’s and AH’s and two, for emphasis. For today, I am not referring to the power of silence as a tool or for emphasis. I am referring to the Power of Silence as an experience! After speaking in Rotterdam I had a rare opportunity to visit Munich. Just outside of Munich is Dachau. Dachau was one of the first concentration camps set up in WW II. The experience I had there I was not prepared for… our tour guide, Eric, was a master of telling the story of the memorial. He was their voice! His voice was calm and even as he told us some of the history during the 3 hours I was there. The camp started in 1939. Its’ main purpose was a working camp for political prisoners - men only. The camp was freed in 1945 - it was a place of horror for 12 long years. When someone arrived at the camp they ...
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Your Core Story: Part 3

Core Story Foundation..........I have found in helping others that one of the greatest RESULTS of your core story is identifying the key difference you make in the world. Most people from my experience sell themselves short! When asked why should I promote, hire or choose to work with you- most people cannot articulate clearly three reasons why! Today take a moment and do two things: 1. Identify the top three things that set you up as an industry or expert resource. 2. Identify what would be your major life lesson up to this exact moment. The short term outcome is both an “elevator speech” and a “sales pitch”. The immediate outcome is clarity of purpose and message and third, the long term outcome is being seen as a Purpose Driven Entrepreneur. This allows you to offer a LIFETIME OF EDUCATION, LIFETIME OF SERVICE AND A LIFETIME OF LEADERSHIP! Take a look at some current statistics:
  • Right Management Survey: 66% of people are somewhat unsatisfied in their jobs
  • Global Mercer Survey: 28-56% are unhappy with their lives
  • Top reasons why people leave their jobs: unfulfilling work, no recognition, limited development, under appreciated
  • Top reasons people start a business: be the ...
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Your Core Story: Part 2

Communication Strategies..................Your Core Story - Part 2: ‘WHY’ Your Core Story Your core story creates your UNIQUE BRAND. A brand that is only YOU! No different from your personal finger print! The best definition I ever read of brand is .........”BRAND is the truth of you told well”. Every single one of us and our businesses are looking to establish complete uniqueness. We typically talk feature, function and people look at their watches and say, “Is it over yet?” When we hear a story, we get involved, stay engaged and say.....”TELL ME MORE!” Imagine that happening on your next sales call, customer presentation or conference call!!! Your core story instantly creates RELATIONSHIP AND COMMUNITY with the people with whom you are speaking. It’s what I call the “me too factor”. This has happened to you a thousand times. You’re listening to someone speak, share a story, or an experience. In your head you’re saying, “That happened to me, I had the same experience!” That’s the “me too factor”! When that happens relationship is formed and trust has a foundation to build from. All you did was share your aspect of your core story. Your core story NEVER ENDS. It is ...
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Your Core Story: Part 1

Communication Strategies.......Your Core Story! How to Gain Trust and Relationship and Sustain It! Daniel Pink’s new book, To Sell is Human, The Surprising Truth About Moving Others! is tremendous! In an interview I saw with him he stated very clearly he believes all of us are in sales. Some people are in actual exchange of products and services for money and some of us or in exchange of time, information and activity. I find it interesting that everyone focuses on the first part of that title and misses the second part. The most powerful part, “The surprising truth about moving others!” I have found the key to standing out and moving others is your Core Story. It is the catalyst to moving others! I believe the Core Story is the ultimate secret weapon in building trust, establishing relationship and keeping people, customers, clients engaged! According to Annette Simmons, “Whoever tells the best story wins!” I completely agree with her! With almost every communication class I have taught there are several stories that are told that move me to laughter, to tears and to wanting to take action! I know you have experienced the same thing! We love a great ...
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